I heard something the other day that just rocked my world.

When I was there, I just knew: this is where I’m supposed to be. This is where God wants me to be…

Something like this can stir up your emotion on a regular day, but after you have been questioning your career choices, and ambitions, this can really hit you hard. 

Even before I started college, I had given up on my dreams. I let doubt creep into my life, and convince me that I could never make it into med school. It would be too hard, it would cost too much, it would take all my time, I wasn’t smart enough etc. 

I sit here almost 5 years later thinking, what an idiot. My job entails me working with Doctors and medical professionals on a daily basis. Every time I walk into one of these places, I just feel this feeling of regret, and shame. I just sell things to the Doctors; I’m not a provider, I don’t make a real difference. 

My career ambitions in life have been fuled almost primarily by money. What I’m sadly, just now beginning to realize how unbelievably empty that is. 

I desire fulfillment and joy and passion, but I’ve traded it in for a paycheck with more zeros. You know what zeros are? They’re empty. 

I know and I’ve learned that Paul says in the New Testament, “For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” – 2 Corinthians 12:10. But I’m not sure what this means for me right now. Should I be content with my career path, although I know it’s not my calling? Or should I go to a place that I can truly experience passion in my vocation? Who can know for sure. Not I! 

My prayer is for discernment in my opportunities, and strength to find job and purpose wherever it is the Lord has me. I’m listening, where do you want me to go?